Nothing beats the joys of parenthood. Absolutely nothing…
- Darling daughter #1(dd#1) throws a box of crayons into my wife’s brand new (under 2 weeks) dryer machine. Wife has nervous breakdown. I spend the rest of the night chiseling crayon out of the drum with a screwdriver.
- I get down to Washington on a business trip to find my books were removed from my suit case and replaced with a few well chosen Webkinz.
- I call home from Washington and DD#1 answers the phone. She wants to talk to one of the Webkinz and I have to do the voice for it before she’ll put the wife on.
- We carefully select the seeds we want to put in our garden for the year. Before we start them, DD#1 plants them all in a single flower bed.
- DD#2 inexplicable has a bead from a necklace making kit stuck in her ear, defying all efforts by both the pediatrician and the ENT specialist to remove it. It was finally resolved with surgery.
- Finding your favorite tie knotted to a stuffed animal in the yard…and it’s been there through the thunderstorm the night before.
- Speaking of thunderstorms, just because it’s a double bed doesn’t mean that you’re not going to have 4 people in it during a storm…
- “I lost my wubbie/teddie/blankie” hunts.
- Finding your wife’s missing diamond ring on a stuffed animal…two days after the hunt began.
- Gum on anything (actually, that’s gum on EVERYTHING).
- Clothes wars are great fun in the morning. You want to wear your ballet tutu with flip flops and striped leggings to Church? After an hour of argument, it might not seem like such a bad option…